The lie about the cake

The other day, my wife and I were visiting some friends. They have kids, too. 

Apart from the horde of scuttling babies, it was a pretty relaxing afternoon. The kids were playing together. At some point, my three-year-old daughter got the last piece of a cake. Without being asked, she deliberately shared her piece of cake with a boy. Once the cake was out, this boy went to look for more cake - for both of them. He found one. They ate from the other cake, and for the rest of the afternoon, they played together. No stress, no argument, just pure joy.

I was proud.

There’s no big conclusion to this story. It’s just an observation that made me feel good and showed me proof that giving is great.

(Giving is one of my three core principles.)

I can’t say for sure what would have happened if my daughter didn’t share her piece of cake. But I know that we all enjoyed that afternoon. And I think we can learn from our kids. 

Unconditional but reasonable giving - be it by helping someone out, by being happy for someone that they have success, by not talking crap about other musicians, and the list goes on…

Once you have changed your view from enemy to friend, contestant to collaborator, and competitor to partner, it will open up a whole new world for you.

Do you give unconditionally within reason? If not yet, my challenge for you is to start right now. To make it a bit less abstract, I’ve prepared a guideline for you.

Here are five action steps you can follow:

  1. Find 10 musicians who make great music that you like.
  2. Research a bit and look for a way to help them. For example, ask if they are okay with you promoting their music to your fans. Or ask them if they are interested in featuring one of your songs. Or something else… Be innovative 🙂
  3. Reach out to them, and tell them (1) what you like about their music, and (2) make them the offer to help if they’re interested.
  4. Do not expect anything in return. You will probably get some weird responses. And some people won’t text you back. But the ones that do, can bring a lot of value into your life.
  5. Whatever the outcome - feel good.

We are eight billion people on earth. There’s not only one cake.

I read and reply to every message.

Better words = more fans?


What’s success for you?


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